As I told Andrew earlier, I think from now on this is how we should settle all those fights that we don’t have:

A New MTV Show: Dance Justice

A new show where disputes are settled by a winner takes all dance off! We are looking for different situations; best friend dented your car and won’t pay you back, your boyfriend or girlfriend ditched you after you bought them expensive concert tickets and they never paid you back etc, or maybe you have an old score to settle.

You will each be trained by a professional dance instructor/ choreographer, and then you will come on the show and have a dance off in front of a judge to prove your case.

Casting fun, hip, energetic people 18 & over who are local to the Southern California area that want to put an end to their REAL problems.

Both parties will receive a $250.00 appearance fee.
Winner will receive up to $500.00 for winning their case.

To be considered email your name, age, all your contact info, and a description of your case.

Send to: dancejustice@mtvstaff.com

Ask yourself: what would Martin Luther King do?

My favorite Top Gear presenter, Captain Slow, takes on Gordon Ramsay, one of my favorite tv chefs—lots of fun, very satisfactory results, and a great thing to share in my first post of the new year:

It seems more than a little silly to have a favorite commercial, but this lady makes me happy every time she comes on:

Nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea, yyyyyyeah!

Flustered more by the total cliché of having a crush on a barista than by the actual cuteness* of said barista, I completely forgot that I’d ordered a chai latte instead of my usual café au lait and proceeded to dump two packets of raw sugar into my cup without so much as a sip beforehand. Cute barista looked at me with an expression I recognized as the exact same face I make when the person ahead of me at the movie concessions stand orders a giant tub of popcorn with butter and a gallon cup of Diet Coke.
I’m not sure where I found the strength to smile and walk slowly out of the coffeehouse, instead of dropping my cup and running away in embarassment never to return, but now I’m sitting on my bed, sipping my far-too-sweet beverage, wishing I wasn’t such a giant dork.
* Although he is terribly cute—I do not usually like hipsters or musicians, and he is clearly both, but oh his hair is so wonderfully floppy, his glasses are at the exact intersection of nerdy and stylish, and his beard is the perfect length for making out. These are the kinds of things I only type out when I am single.